Hair drop
Today, I finally decided to shave my head. It is 14 days since my first Chemo treatment and my hair has started to dramatically fall out in clumps. I am 45 years old and have stage 3 Breast Cancer. I was in perfect health and the diagnosis came as a complete shock to me. I exercise regularly, has no diabetes, no high blood pressure and is not even overweight. I have a strange feeling that the 5cm lump on my right breast and lumps in the lymph nodes were triggered by the Pfizer Covid vaccine I took in June 2021. (Just google Lymph node Covid Vaccine or click on this CNN article)
I first noticed the lump in July 2021 but didn't seek treatment as I was still breastfeeding and thought that it was a blocked duct. In Aug, my family was placed on Quarantine order and it was inconvenient to go out. So I just brushed the lump aside. On 9 Sep the lump seem to be getting bigger and I finally decided to seek medical attention. And this mark the start of my whirlwind life change. After mammogram, ultrasound, biopsy (SGD$8k), MRI (S$2k), PET CT (S$3k) scans, I was told that I have ER positive Breast Cancer and need chemotherapy due to the spread of the cancer to the lymph nodes.
For the first few days, I was devastated and scared. The few people I know who had to go through Chemotherapy were all dead after the treatment. After spending 2 days crying and feeling sorry for myself, I started looking for answers and hope on the internet. I began looking for cancer survivors and checking how long after their treatment they are still living (or making posts on the internet). To my surprise, there are many survivors living more than 15 years after their cancer diagnosis. Looks like much research has gone into cancer treatment and cancer is treatable? I decided to pick myself up and fight for more time.
After installing a Port-a-Cath (S$19k) in a day procedure under general anesthesia (or just sedation but I was too chicken to watch the whole episode in the operating theatre), I was given the Cyclophospamide and Doxorubicin (red devil) cocktail treatment on the very same day. The red devil treatment felt like getting a 'fish bone' stuck in the throat. Fortunately for me, some volunteers of the breast cancer foundation were at the cancer center that day and was chatting with me while the IV was being delivered. Also sucking on the ice cubes that the nurses provided helped sooth the discomfort and the treatment was over before I realized what really was happening. However, nausea was a problem for me and I puked a few times (in the car on the way back and at home just before dinner). Nausea haunted be through the night even when I took Metoclopramide. I was also constipated due to the nausea pills I took. Nausea lasted for 7 days.
From day 8 onwards, life was back to normal. I stopped taking the pain killers and nausea pills and started to do some Pilates exercises to regain my strength. My port-a-cath site is still feeling raw and so I didn't do any other vigorous exercises. As the days progressed, I started feeling like my old self. I even thought that I won't be losing my hair as the chemo effect seems to be wearing off.
But I was wrong. On day 11, my hair fall is slowly starting. Slightly more hair at the shower drain after a hair wash and when I comb my hair. Very subtle hair drop but slightly more significant then the usual daily hair drop. Then on day 14 it happens. Clumps of hair comes off when I try to comb my hair in the morning. So much to the point that I decided not to comb it and just tie it in a messy bun. In the afternoon, I asked my husband to shave my head for me.
My head now feels very icy cool after the shave. It is like having the air conditioning turned on at my head. I like this feeling. It feels like I have been upgraded to a elevated sense of being. Tomorrow is round 2 of chemo treatment. Lets see what adventure awaits.
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